Top 2 Synthesizer-Laden Albums About Plants, Nothing Else, Just Plants

 

 

1. Stevie Wonder - The Secret Life of Plants
2. Mort Garson - Plantasia

stay tuned for more epic music criticism from me Jackthony Detstano!!! Like an subscribe!!!!

 

im bringing it back [2]

its very personally fitting that the last 2 posts here were called "im bringing it back" and then a shitty poem. that is so real 

 

in a way everything has changed, and nothing has changed, since the last time i posted. this is generally how life works [CITATION NEEDED] so none of you are probably very surprised. That's Ok!

right now i am at a crossroads in my life. i am supposed to be getting my car license but I'm not sure if I actually am or not. I am going back to college too soon to actually do anything, or at least that's what my brain tells me. I've been sleeping a lot lately and watching videos of weird insects and tracking tropical weather despite its complete irrelevance to my very land-locked life. Which is all definitely better than having a job.

 

What will I do with this blog now? Nobody knows! But something I promise fr and if not, to quote George W Bush:

"There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again."

short poem

 ode to a dead baby squirrel

i hope that between all the screams
you saw how beautiful the sky was

im bringing it back

hello blog post fans (i am being very overly ambitious here by assuming i have an audience of doting fans, which i probably do not. if you are a doting fan of this blog you should probably seek psychiatric help)

i am VERY VERY VERY VERYY sorry for my continued hiatus on this blog. ok the capitalized very's are doing too much tbqh i'm not that sorry. but i am kind of sorry. there we go.

i spent some of my absence having a life (gasp!), some of it obsessively reviewing every number 1 billboard hit (i got to like 1966. i know. i should've been reviewing beach boys albums. blog friend i am so so sorry) (again) (but still not like that sorry), and i also spent some of it being anxious (typical).

however i am now at the part of the summer where i am looking back on my past, akin to scrooge mcduck, and reviewing the beautiful art and creativity that i have unleashed unto the world and the progress that i have made. the answer is not very much sadly :((( i have not really done anything! it's quite sad

i made all of this text bold by accidewnt and i dont know ho to unbold it help he.p help help

ok there i fixed it. im leaving that in idc. im winning the idgaf war (the last f stands for 'flip' if anyone is wondering )

but ANYWAYZ i feel like this blog stands as a totem to my potential as a human being and i hate to see it go to waste! really i do truly i really do. so i have decided to write this entirely pointless rambling post to like make it up to myself somehow. im honestly not even sure how i want someone to read or engage with this post, i am very much doing this for myself at this point. i dont know. i hope you had some fun, or if not, like, idk whatever you chose to read this blog. maybe go for a walk or watch HBO Max instead... that would be more fun..........

lyrics

it's like christmas when you were a kid
go on a horse
ride on a sleigh ride
it's too much and it's everything
it's bad and it's alright
and it's good

it's like a flash of blinding light
purples blues and everywhere
you'll find it where you meet you at the corner
at the train station at the corner
at the train station where the bugs live
at the train station where the bugs live

you can find it where you turn the light out
you can find it where the window opens
window opens to a scene of clouded figures
soft and green
pale and hairy
small and fairy
stuck in the pale moonlight
you can't see it try as you might
it's a scene
soft and mean
it's scary and it's you
you can reflect it and it's you
you are you
no more you build it no more

but it's soft and it's light
it's like you
it's congenial music
you're listening to congenial music
this is the amplification of the form
this is the amplification of the form
this is the prescence of the form
the fulfillment of the form
the form and you want more of the form
but we have to GO now
the program's OVER
we showed you congenial music

this is congenial music
it watches over you
it washes over you like a fountain
i am not telling you about this
in a way to make you feel like my work is bad
because that's what it does
and i receive it
and it
i receive it from myself
it washes over like a fountain

it's time for me to go.

poems about things

 poem about mall

i was always fascinated by malls
i saw one on mario kart
the music was fun
i went to one and it was just a bunch of teenagers
getting high
and weird old people
there's no magic left in anything.
i'll shovel off the sidewalk
and watch hamtaro

 poem about sonic

i wish i wrote sonic fanfic
sonic would be like 100 years old and hot
tails would be
i don't kknow
shadow the hedgehog has a gun
that's very exciting.
sonic colors was a fun game i remember the weird minigame thing
i watch it on the tv
i was 100 years old and hot
shadow the hedehog

poem about rocks

i am a rock
i am a water
vogue vogue vogue vogue vogue vogue MADONNA MADONNA 

 
These poems are even more inscrutable and less good than the poem I did before this. The poem I posted before this I thought was quite good and resembled my inner psyche, which is the objective of "poem". These were written before that one which I will interpret as me getting better at this whole poetry thing. The world just keeps on turning! I look out my window and the colors change. It is a mesmerizing. I hope one day I will go on a sail boat.

poem in 3 parts

poem in 3 parts (triptych) (i'm gay (i'm happy))

i just want a shitty little house in the depths of america
in a comfy neighborhood, away from the despotism of big yards,
with a porch and a swing and a golden retriever,
but i'll settle for a poodle
but i have to have the swing.
and i want a ratty old couch
and some questionable wallpaper
and i want to stand outside
in the cool autumn air
and breath in the burnt auburn hue
of life all around me
in the dirt and in the trees
and i will look into somebody's eyes,
and they'll shrug
and say,
"i guess you're okay."
and i'll fall in love
all over again

i never went outside
because i was scared my parents would yell at me
for going on a walk
they never did.
i think i might be insane
i saw a picture on wikipedia
of a neighborhood, like the one by the downtown
if you keep walking past the library
and i felt what i was missing all this time
i want to ride down that street in a bicycle
and wave to my friend kyle
on my way back from elementary school
i didn't go to elementary school.
i lurked on the universe sandbox forums
and my dad gave me hawaiian rolls
and made me oink like a pig.
i hope everyone on that forum is doing well,
i looked back on there not that long ago
most of them are furries now.
my fucking god! these bitches gay!
good for them.

i told my friend i wanted to kiss boys when i was 12.
a week after i told her, she said,
"gosh, jackson,
you're so much funnier now."
it has been 6 years:
i'm still funny,
and i still want to kiss a boy.
the ravages of time cannot separate me from
what i am
and nor can endless scorn
from the unshambolic.
in an act of defiance,
i stand on the edge of a cliff
the model of a true romantic:
"i stay silly."
it is a gospel truth
i can do nothing else
and God knows i tried.

5 more poems

these four poems are a series

based on the passage of time

limited amounts of time... ya

enjoy it please i hope you do

your friend (maybe), jackson

 

 20 second poem

i have beautiful thoughts
and i don't write them down
because i think i'll have another
that's more beautiful
and sometimes i don't
and maybe i won't
until i realize that everything is beautiful,
to everyone i see

15 second poem

rocks aren't 'funky'
rocks don't 'have swing'
rocks 'don't do the watusi'
they're funny
i pick them up
no i don't
rock

10 second poem

mario is a plumber
do you think he loves
do you think he has love in his life
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

5 second poem

NO capitalize
it's chill
it's fine
woohhh

0 second poem

some more poems

 this is not the post i was going to make but it is. que sera sera. (this is the title of a song by doris day which was covered by sly and the family stone and both versions are quite nice but i really like the sly and the family stone one. que sera sera means 'everything will be will be' according to the song but it actually doesn't mean that in any actual languages which is a disgusting act of fabrication but it's okay because the song is really sweet. it has that same warm hug feeling that a lot of movie songs have from that period like moon river which is another great song which i knew how to play on the piano until i didn't i'm not sure why i'm ranting like this about que sera sera it's just a good song which i like)

-------------------------------

poem 1 (untitled)

i think sometimes
people try too hard to be deep
this is a funny thing to say
while writing a poem,
because poems are an avenue
for people who want to be deep

but some things just are
like my laundry basket
which sits there menacingly
i guess you could say it's sad,
that's thinking about it too much.
it just is. i'm sorry.

-------------------------------

poem 2 (hypocrite (in relation to poem 1))

you will never get to know
even the things in front of your face
isn't that beautiful
press the lily to your face
and breathe

-------------------------------

hell on earth

the crickets are made out of glass
they make glass noises
balding men say "wohhhhhh"
"wohhhhhh, wohhh, wohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

-------------------------------

wall of text

i went on this website as a kid
it was just a wall of text
it went on forever
and anyone could type on it
maybe it's still out there
an endless wall of slurs
and shitty stickmen
i had a conversation once
i think i made a friend.
you could scroll out into the abyss
but it got sparser as you went
eventually,
you were just the only one
i travel to places no one else goes

-------------------------------

font

i write my poem in notepad
i tried wordpad,
but i realized i could change the font
and i got stuck doing that
for a few minutes.
but that is okay
this is pedestrian
rudimentary and bounded
you cannot do many things
and that is okay
it is better to be a prisoner
than to be free

-------------------------------

those are my poems. i hope you liked them. happy 2023

NEW BLOG

 First of all - This blog is NOT being retired. It will still feature my writings, inscrutable ramblings, and music reviews (which should also resume soon if I find the motivation).

Upon looking at my 'Gaelan Adventures' KSP blog, I terrifyingly discovered that it is still getting a LOT of views, and has in fact been getting a LOT of views for months even though I stopped posting on it years ago. Clearly there is demand for a Kerbal Space Program mission report blog on this website. I have no idea why, but there is one.

Therefore (after spending several hours getting my modpack to work), I have elected to create a new blog for my efforts to explore the Quarter-Sized Real Solar System mod:
https://kspqsrssexploration.blogspot.com/

Read it if you're interested! If you're not, don't.

Peace!

Jackson

Ruminations on Christmas

 Hello. I was going to write an article entitled "How to Destroy the Holiday Industrial Complex with Weaponized Cringe" and it is a very good article and it is about 1/2 done and I may repurpose it for new years or easters or next Christmas or I may forget about it entirely. It is what it is. (I don't know why I made Easter plural. Don't worry.)

Instead I am writing this substantially less funny and substantially more psychologically distressing passage about Christmas and my thoughts on it.

Christmas is a holiday in December that a lot of people celebrate because of this thing called 'Christianity'. I am not personally a card-carrying member of this whole 'Christianity' thing, but I am still forced to celebrate it, and I am not sure why.

The object of Christmas is to give gifts to each other I think because that's supposed to be good. In practice, this means people assume you want things, and they hand them to you and you either want them or pretend to want them. I am so bad at the whole Christmas thing that I seem like I don't want the things I want. Having to pretend to want things is above my pay grade.

There is also music which begins to play like a month before Christmas and keeps playing until about 2 seconds after Christmas Day ends. This music is occasionally fun. My favorite Christmas song is "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime" by Paul McCartney, which is not a song that people like, but I have a spiritual connection with it. I avoid this song because it makes me cry. The last time I listened to this song was in June and it made me cry. When I was in my sophomore year of high school the teacher asked me what my favorite Christmas song was and I lied and I said "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" by Darlene Love was my favorite, which everyone was very confused by, which I don't understand because it comes on the radio about every 30 minutes during the entire month of December. That is also quite a good Christmas song, which I enjoy.

Other Christmas songs are very annoying, especially some of the newer ones they come out with. There is a song called "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses and I just remembered that I actually like this song so I am not sure why it is in this paragraph. All I know is that sometimes people play these songs while you are supposed to be unwrapping presents and it is too much. I cannot pretend to want things and listen to music at the same time. This is arduous to my soul and contributes immensely to my discomfort with Christmas.

There is also a whole lot of hullabaloo about Santa, who is not a real person. He is also not a religious figure that you are supposed to actually believe in, unless you are a child up to the age of around 7, according to former U.S. President Donald Trump. This is very confusing. All of the adults in the world tell the children to believe in Santa and are horrified by the very concept of their children not believing in him, even taking their children to sit in the laps of various middle-aged men who pretend to be Santa, but none of the adults believe in Santa whatsoever. It is a cultural tradition to lie to children on a massive scale, and people are frequently very annoying about this fact, and say that the adults are being abusive. I am not sure if I believe that, but it is immensely confusing. I first came to the conclusion that Santa wasn't real after looking at the NORAD Santa tracker at about age 8 and realizing that if Santa was moving that fast, the effects of aerodynamic heating would kill him. I was not like most children.

There is much mythology built around Santa. He has a wife and he employs many elves to make toys. He has reindeer and the reindeer have names and one of them is named Rudolph and is very important. There is a lot of media built around this mythology. Some of it is quite delightful and warms the soul and invigorates the spirit. There are many stop motion animations created by a company called 'Rankin-Bass' which are very delightful. The most famous of these animations is probably "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer," which is about Rudolph, the important reindeer, who does have a red nose. The story of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer inspired another movie called "Olive, The Other Reindeer" (a pun relating to a song involving Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer), which is also fun. I mostly know it exists because John Linnell of They Might Be Giants (who I admire greatly) wrote an oddly morose song about it, however I have also seen the movie with a bunch of people who also like They Might Be Giants and I can confirm that it is also fun. (I am one of 60 people who have liked the included YouTube upload of "Olive the Other Reindeer" by John Linnell, and this is a badge I wear with pride.)

Unquestionably, the most movie Christmas is "A Charlie Brown Christmas", which is a movie about Christmas and Charlie Brown. It inspires a deep sense of anguish in me for a life I never lived. The soundtrack is quite nice and the guy who plays the piano on it plays the piano quite in a good fashion. When I was a kid I wished that trees could talk to me, and they never did. This is when I learned that the world is unfair.

If I had to plan Christmas for me I would sit around and watch A Charlie Brown Christmas for an extended length of time and drink some egg-nog (a confusing Christmas drink which tastes good) under some blankets because Christmas is in the winter time and it is cold then. However, unfortunately, most of the time you spend Christmas going to someone else's house and talking to family or watching as other people go into your own house and then having to talk to them.

They ask me questions about myself and I don't know what to say, sometimes. They ask me how I am doing at college and I smile and nod and then realize I was supposed to be answering questions and it makes me sad. I feel as if they are trying to get me to play a part in a Christmas play (not an actual Christmas play, as those exist) and I fail to do the required tasks and it makes me sad. I would rather play Kerbal Space Program or go on a walk with one of my friends in the forest and talk about the meaning of life.

It is all a rather facetious method of communication. I like communicating with people a lot, but when it comes in Christmas time, it is all people you have not talked to in months and months and you catch up with them and they catch up with you and by the time you are all caught up both of you leave again for an extended period of time. If you try to talk about the meaning of life, everyone stares at you. Also, the Christmas phenomenon has a lot to do with putting a lot of people into one room, and I don't like that. I like talking to a few people at a time, but Christmas demands otherwise.

The gift-giving element of Christmas is also mildly frustrating. I already have most of the things that I want, except a fidget toy which isn't a bike lock, and a rocket poster, and a friend within 5 miles of me who is willing to go on a walk through a forest and talk about the meaning of life at 11:05 pm on Christmas. I ask for money every year for Christmas, because you can ask for things, and people get them for you. People get me things that aren't money and some of them are things that I want and others of them I am just forced to invite into my life. Every Christmas I accrue a greater collection of things invited into my life. This Christmas I now own two hoodies. I will probably use the hoodies, but I was not aware of their existence, and I don't know if I needed them. This fact is frustrating.

I often think about making a list of things which I want for Christmas, but I don't know what I want and the list of things which I do want is not nearly long enough to accommodate all of the relatives who are obligated to buy things for me. It is also rather hard to buy a friend. I tell them that I just want money and nothing else, but somehow it is a bad thing to only get me the thing that I ask for. This is also frustrating.
I got lots of candy this Christmas. This has happened many Christmasses before. I will eat some of it and forget about the rest.

Another major element of Christmas are the decorations. You are expected to decorate your house for Christmas and put up lights, which is fun. It is a pastime to drive by other people's houses and look at their lights and admire their disposable incomes. There are also lights inside the house, which is less fun. There are also many, many other decorations. Those who do not decorate are accused of not being festive and not Christmassing enough in their Christmas.

The oddest element of Christmas is the religious element. The Christ part of Christmas is derived from Jesus Christ, an important guy of Christianity, which is a big religion which a lot of people do. People are always concerned that the Democrats are trying to take the Christ out of Christmas. There is an odd dualistic relationship between Christ and Santa. People who like Santa more claim that Santa is derived from Saint Nicholas, and is therefore also religious. Realistically, I do not think Saint Nicholas has much in common with a chubby old man with a long beard who rides a magical, reindeer-led flying sleigh and subjects elves to dubious working conditions at the North Pole. The whole situation is very multi-layered and each of these layers makes it a bit more ridiculous. Christmas is ostensibly the holiday in which Jesus was born, but Jesus was not even born on this day. In fact Christmas was invented after they inserted Jesus into the old Roman holiday of Saturnalia, so perhaps the Santaification of Christmas is nothing but an ongoing cycle. Saturn is my favorite planet. The Roman God called Saturn also inspired a very cool painting by Francisco Goya, which I will not show here, because it is quite scary.

I wanted to end that paragraph with a point, but I am unsure of what point to make. My parents never raised me on the religious aspects of Christmas so it seems to exist as a cultural thing. Annoying people would assert that the modern bastardization of Christmas was invented by capitalists and Christmas is nothing more than a capitalistic excuse to spend money on wrapping paper and unwanted gifts. These annoying people have a good point, but this counter-narrative is almost as mainstream as the main narrative, so I do not want to talk about it very much. Perhaps the most relevant thing I can include is that The Residents (one of the seminal Experimental Rock bands from the United States) have a song called Santa Dog where they say that "Santa Dog's a Jesus Fetus, has no presents, has no presence, in the future." I think this is probably accurate. Richard Nixon was mailed this song, and he probably liked it, because it's a good song.

I think I have pretty much covered most of my important thoughts on Christmas. It's a holiday that exists. There are parts of it I like and other parts that I don't. I am glad that I wrote this article and shared my thoughts and I hope that you enjoyed reading it and it perhaps inspired some novel thoughts about Christmas and/or life in general in your brain. The idea of enriching another person's life by expressing my thoughts in language is an emboldening one, and it makes the ridiculousness of life more tolerable.
The world is strange and confusing and sad and lonely, but we have each other, in the end.

It's going to be okay. Merry Christmas.